Fun Friday – Educated Puns

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Continuing in the grand tradition that is Fun Friday I have yet another list of puns.   These are some of the best that I’ve seen to date.

  • The roundest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
  • I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
  • She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
  • A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.
  • No matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationery.
  • A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
  • A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
  • Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
  • A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
  • Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
  • Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
  • Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: ‘You stay here; I’ll go on a head.’
  • I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
  • A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: ‘Keep off the Grass.’
  • The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
  • The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
  • A backward poet writes inverse.
  • In a democracy it’s your vote that counts. In feudalism it’s your count that votes.
  • When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
  • If you jumped off the bridge in Paris, you’d be in-Seine.

Have a great weekend every one!

For more humorous posts, click here.

About Jodi

Jodi L. Milner is a writer, mandala enthusiast, and educator. Her epic fantasy novel, Stonebearer’s Betrayal, will be published November 2018 by Immortal Works Press. She has been published in several anthologies. When not writing, she can be found folding children and feeding the laundry, occasionally in that order.
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16 Responses to Fun Friday – Educated Puns

  1. The element of surprise is not in the periodic table.

  2. She was only a cattleman’s daughter, but all the cow manure.

    (Really only works out loud)

  3. Heather says:

    Ha ha ha ha ha! Thanks–I’ll be hanging on to these.

  4. nrhatch says:

    Thanks for the pun fun!

  5. Lua says:

    “I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.”
    haha Thanks for the laugh! 🙂

  6. Ha! I thoroughly enjoyed this post. As a lover of all things literary, I get a kick out of stuff like this. I hadn’t heard of many of these before. I was partial to the whiskey one, of course.

  7. Allison says:

    I cannot stop laughing. truly funny.

  8. I have to admit, I do not like puns. I usually find them fairly groan worthy – which I guess is where the humour lies.
    I do like the dog one here, being cited for littering.
    Thanks for sharing this list.

  9. agatha82 says:

    “Sir Cumference”…. *chuckles childishly* That was my fave of them all. Thanks for the good laugh 🙂

  10. tsuchigari says:

    Thank you all for stopping by! I laughed out loud when I read them and knew I had to share with my buddies.

  11. “No matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationery.”

    LOL! thanks for the laugh this morning.. : )

  12. Pingback: Weekly Review #18 « My Literary Quest

  13. deepercolors says:

    I’ll have to think of a joke to add. ‘Til then I will just laugh at these. 🙂

  14. Pingback: What’s new at your library? | World University Information

  15. Akashio says:

    >_<! These are brilliant!

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